An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on his face.
"What are you so happy about?" Asked the barman?
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know, I live by the railway. Well, on my way home last night, I noticed a young woman tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her free and took her back to my place. Anyway, to make a long story short, I scored big time! We made mad passionate love all night long."
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "Was she pretty?"
"Dunno'...Never found the head!"
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