I get up for the next couple of weeks to come sit in this office, stare at the screen and try to swallow this lump of a heartache and feeling of dread, of dejection, of rejection, and for what? To pack up six years' worth of memories into a box, bring it home, put it on the floor and pace around it like a tiger in a cage, pissed off, listless and frightened?
Fucking worst feeling in the world. I can't help it. Logically I cannot take it personally, there are some incredibly talented people here who also got let go, but my emotional response is "I wasn't good enough to make the cut".
This is the 3rd company restructure I've gone through, and all three times I've been let go. I've never been good enough to keep.
*insert a bunch of 4-letter words here*
I just feel like crying, like crawling into a cave to let this feeling pass. People need happy and positive, they need smiles and strong backbones! Say no to pity parties!
Amazing how much of our identities are tied in with our jobs.
/end of Feeling Like A Hobo post/
16 comments:
*hug* Don't go down the "not good enough" track. You are amazing. Anyone can tell that from your writing and photographs.
I don't know what the idiots are thinking of letting you go.
Good luck. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Um I highly doubt that "not good enough" is true...k?
I'm pretty sure there are a few instances where I could have been let go, but my little instincts told me to look for another job and I got out before that could happen (and then found out they reduced the work force). So m'dear, it ain't personal.
They should have given you 2 weeks notice, nothing worse than sitting there AFTER the axe has already fallen.
:( boooo
Someday I'll get a job I can actually enjoy. Every time I've quit or been fired, there's always been that sense of relief rather than remorse.
I think that it's not about how good you were, but quotas and money. A lot of people are being laid off, a lot of them damn fine workers. It's definitely not personal, and the fact that it's happened before? Well that should mean that you knwo better than anyone how to get back up on your feet. Right? Maybe? I don't know.
Ah girl, I know you are most definitely good enough. Such a difficult time for you :(
(hugs)
Aw, sorry to hear this. I've been there a couple of times myself and the feeling is just awful.
You'll make it through and who knows what will come of it. I'm somewhere now I never thought I'd be, and it's turned out to be a good place.
Hang in there and trust in yourself.
99% of the time, whoever goes is not based on skills, reliability or even company need. 99% of the time, it's based on who knows whom. And being that your company is the little guy, it's not likely you're in a position to know the right people in the big company...
That's why nobody has career jobs anymore- no matter how loyal, you're never safe. It's capitalism at its finest.
My friend's dad got let go last year after more than twenty years of service. A few months later, as he eased into his retirement, they called him up and said they needed him back because nobody could fill his shoes.
Loyalty is not an asset these days.
Oh and (hugs).
I'm so sorry girl. Its a tough thing to go through. I can't say enough about how stupid they must be and they don't deserve you. You'll bounce back. You will. And you will be better off for it.
Hugs and wishes coming your way.
im sorry to hear that. don't ever think that you are not good enough, i'm sure you'll find a job better than the previous.. i wish you well, btw nice blog.
I can't imagine the feeling. :-(
I hope this is one of these events in life that seem like a bad thing at first but end up being the start of a better situation.
I'm sure you will find a great job pretty quickly and you should take this opportunity to take a look back at what makes you happy in a job and try to find it in your next one.
*Hugs*
Charles
OMG. This is sooo bad. I am sorry this happened to you Techno. Damn this stupid economy.
Your comments: Amazing how much of our identities are tied in with our jobs is so very true.
I've done the same job for 19 years! And now I think I need a switch, but most people only see me as one job skill (ugh) ...
Gotta keep dreaming...Good luck to yourself ..your dream job will come!
I wish to thank each and every one of you individually for your amazing support and understanding: how can I fail, when surrounded by such awesomeness? (this is now a word, yes).
I promise to be more upbeat and positive, life will work itself out - it always does - however there may be some lows, that's what hot chocklit and hugs are for, right?
Love you guys!!
Why me or why not me????? The rain falls on the good and the bad.
Yep. And the good come prepared with an umbrella and wellies :-)
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