Live, love, life

We understand death for the first time
when he puts his hand upon one whom we love.
~Madame de Stael

Outsider

I don't think I've ever "fit in" with society.

Maybe that's why I love it out here so much?

I don't have to prove myself to anyone, I don't have to impress, dress up, or compete with people for attention and fake kudos. No rejections, no pretending to be someone I'm not, smiling when I feel blue or sharing my so-important personal space.

Maybe it's the ugly duckling syndrome that never quite faded away?

I always knew I was different but when I was five years old and we moved to a remote anglophone village hours away from my home town, it really made its mark.

Nobody understood French so I had to learn English very fast in order to survive. Even then I would always have a strange accent - it still follows me today. My name was unpronounceable, so it got mocked - a lot.

Then came the big buckteeth, the straggly frizzy hair that was impossible to do anything with, the long monkey arms, then the braces, the acne and the chest that refused to grow any boobs.

We moved again, family life was shit, my clothing always felt out of place and the acne got worse. I was beyond homely and was reminded of it time and time again when being chosen last on any school event team. I had some good friends but was part of the wallflower runts. Having skipped a grade earlier, I was one of the youngest in my classes and made to feel like a freak, and not a smart one either.

Fear of public speaking paralyzed me. I sucked at gym class and could never invite any friends over to our tiny house as life there was too embarrassing. I watched alot, but never said much. I watched and envied and wished and cried, but it never changed anything.

I was among the last to get a boyfriend in high school. I was shy and knew my place: in the corner with the other outsiders.

Strangely enough, I found a home with these people.

Strength in unity?

Fast-forward a couple of decades and it's a whole new world. I survived and am probably stronger for it than if life had been easy and cozy all along. Fighters appreciate life more in the end, I think. Little things mean so much more.

I like myself now. Yes, I'm different and you know, I'm thankful for it.

My bad skin is under control now, my hair still sucks and my boobs never really grew in, but then again I don't look my age so that's good.

I finally got boyfriends, which made me realize most men are stupid and will stomp on your heart at any moment's notice. Then I got lucky and married the best man in the world.

My family may have had its share of hardships but we're there for each other, it just strengthened the bond.

Jobs come and go but knowledge is forever.

Same for friends, true friends.

I am finally happy now. I don't fit anywhere so I found a place that fit me. I feel loved and accepted for who I am, quirks and all.

Time to celebrate :)

/end of Growing Pains post/

Aces high

The air up there in the clouds is very pure and fine,
bracing and delicious.
And why shouldn't it be?
- it is the same the angels breathe.
~Mark Twain, "Roughing It"

Groundhog Day

Remember that movie with Bill Murray?

Yeah, that's us today :-D

It's noon now, the snow has finally ended after pelting down all morning.

*breathes huge sigh of relief*

Now begins the wait, watching the drip drip drip of melting snow waterlog the land, wondering if the freak snowfall killed this year's crop of mosquitoes. Hah. One could be so lucky!

Forgive me for all the rants?

/end of Tea, Cookies, Wontons And Wine post/

Laughter, the best medicine

I wish I could laugh, though.

Right now I'm so close to tears, it's anything but funny.

The snow hasn't stopped falling for one single minute since 6am. And more in the forecast for tomorrow. Then rain on Thursday, which is when we have yet another (fruitless time-wasting) house visit and of course Vegas isn't here so I have to clean the whole giant house by myself and I have no car, so where am I supposed to go for an hour in the rain with three giant muddy dogs?

Yeah.

Go on, laugh - maybe it'll be contagious? :-o

I really tried today, I swear.

I baked a bunch of yummy cookies:

I made lovely fragrant wontons (pork, tofu, fresh lime, fresh coriander, fresh ginger and garlic, green onions...) and if you've ever made the little bastids you know they take forever. Vegas helped glue them together, that was cool :)

I did laundry.

I tried to entertain the pissed-off chickens and nurse the sick babies - they get better then BAM! Cold and humid and another one catches a death rattle.

Awesome.

I poured a glass of wine from the bottle and it took two sips to realize it had turned to vinegar. I guess that will happen after ten days on the kitchen counter... Ooops.

No other wine in the house.

At least the dogs are pragmatic about the snowstorm:

Yeah... I wish I were a dog.
Life would be easier sometimes.

Vegas said I should quit whining, I've been complaining all freaking day. And it hasn't even helped, I still feel like crumbling to bits. Everything is buried under a ton of heavy snow, it will take me hours to fix the damage it did to the coop run, the flower gardens are ruined, the land will take days to drain (muddy dogs, muddy dogs, muddy dogs... muddy house) and more people want to come see the property but nobody ever makes an offer.

Sick of this.

I want OUT of this goddamn place!

Aberration of nature

Mother Nature is drunk off her tits.

Seriously.

Look at today's date.

Then look at these pics I snapped an hour ago
and tell me there is no such thing as global warming:

There is twice as much snow on the ground and in the trees now.

And it's pelting down with no respite.

Good-bye sweet tulips, good-bye gentle crocuses, au revoir budding plants and delicate flowers, baby birds and singing frogs. Sayonara t-shirts, suntan lotion and butterflies.

We live in hell now.

/end of Please Shoot Me post/

Big pile o'poop

After months of searching for a property even remotely interesting to visit, I found exactly one but of course it's too far from the city. Poop. And Vegas pointed out that since it had a huge annexed building (perfect for the flock, the dogs, etc) there was no way in hell we'd ever buy such a place as it was ridiculous how big it was.

Even if it's affordable.

Um, excuse me? There's a limit on the size of barn I'm allowed to have?

I am not a happy wife right now.

In fact I'm pretty flippin' pissed off.

If you know me at all, you know to never tell me what I can and cannot do. Never set limits on my dreams and certainly never tell me that I'm being ridiculous. That will only earn you the Wrath Of Techno, and trust me: you don't want that.

Don't poop where you eat.

I'm just sayin'.

And as for this piece of SHIT weather we're getting for the next week, well it can go stuff itself up its own ass, that's what. April 26th? Snow? Dear god the planet has turned into a giant retard. GAAAH!

Oh, please do click to get the giggles:

Only I'm not laughing, not laughing at all.

Hopefully the long drive into the city tomorrow won't be pure hell. It's enough I have to sit in the dentist's chair for over an hour of tooth scraping - talk about a really fun day.

Wheeeeeeee! Partaaay!

OK this post is going nowhere so I'll throw you some LSD-laced confetti that tastes like rainbows and butterflies and leave it at that.

/end of Pissed Off Techno post/

From hand to mouth

Tasty things I remember loving when I was younger... Up to what age I'm not disclosing, some are still favourites so you be the judge ;-)

Kraft Dinner. On occasion with sliced hotdogs in it, drizzled with ketchup. Fried baloney slices, with ketchup. Sweet dark baked beans, with ketchup. Fresh thick home-made french toast with maple syrup, not with ketchup. Sliced bananas with brown sugar and cold milk. A concoction of peanut butter, raisins and raw oatmeal (don't ask). Oreos dunked in cold milk. Count Chocula cereal.

Hot tomato soup with grilled-cheese sandwiches.
Slices of raw turnip dunked in salt.
Fresh crunchy rhubarb stalks dipped in sugar.
Hot buttered toast with caramel.
Kool-Aid.

Fresh sweet corn on the cob - I could (and still can) eat a dozen in one sitting.
My grandmother's pineapple cake.
My grandmothers's roast beef, gravy and mashed potatoes.
Her hodge-podge soup.
Tomato and cheese sammiches on hot toast with lettuce and mayo.
French onion soup, au gratin.

My mom's pasta casseroles.
My mom's "pudding chomeur".
Her lasagna.
My dad's spaghetti with romano cheese, butter and tabasco.
Chicken dumplings.
My stepmom's ceasar salad.
My stepmom's bread.
Her spicy portuguese cod and potato fried dumplings.

Freshly-fried mini donuts, with or without the icing sugar on top. McDonald's anything. Greco Donair's french fries with gravy. Ice cream sandwiches. Fresh fruit salad drizzled with maple syrup. My mom's soft chocolate cookie sandwiches with vanilla icing filling. Fresh bread with peanut butter, sprinkled with sugar. Dunked in chocolate milk.

I guess this explains most of the fillings in my mouth.

Please wish me luck on my dentist appointment this Tuesday!

/end of Yum Yum post/

Nom nom nom

Is it better to out-monster the monster or to be quietly devoured?
Friedrich Nietzsche

The good life

It's amazing what a bit of warm sun can do to one's soul.

We are so retiring somewhere warm!

Yep, it's decided. Screw the endless bitterly cold winters - we're moving somewhere coastal and enjoying life as it should be. Hopefully sooner than later if life wishes us well, cuz cruising the beach with a walker and a bad case of arthritis kinda sucks if you know what I mean!

In other house news, the people who looked so promising to put an offer on the house turned out to be time-wasters. I really don't get it: if your budget it so-and-so, why the hell do you visit properties way above your means or what you want to pay? You know?

So annoying.

We have another house visit on Sunday so hopefully, at some point, the damn place will get sold so we can get our life in order. Sick and tired of endless cleaning and then having our personal space invaded by strangers. Hate it!

Anyways. What can ya do except hope for the best and deal with the rest.

I finally managed to take a pic of my lap chicken today, she also doubles as my shoulder chicken - and no it's not staged, it's what she likes to do! Quite the adventure to have a hen fly up to roost on your head because she wants a cuddle, LOL!

Horrible ghost-squinting-in-the-sun photo,
but you get the idea:

Sweetie, my brown leghorn, fancies herself a parrot.

Or a cat, depending on her mood:


I loves her :)

I have to share a sad story with you. Last night a very lovely family (mom, dad, 9 year old son) came to get two silkie chicks that they had anxiously been waiting for since before they were born. I picked two that seemed the healthiest since there was one in the bunch that was sneezing and coughing (remember my last post? Well another baby got sick but the rest seemed fine) and I had put everyone on antibiotics to clear things up.

They brought the babies home, gave them names and were so thrilled, until they woke up this morning to find one of the babies had an eye swollen shut and was gasping for breath :(

The stress of the ride home brought out a hidden infection and it was dying.

The poor woman was sobbing on the phone and didn't know what to do, I gave her options and she chose euthanasia by the vet. I'm a softie and totally understood her broken heart, lord knows I have cried for those chickens... Until she told me the real reason this incident was so difficult.

They recently lost their four and a half year old daughter. Their son, upon finding the sick baby this morning, burst into tears as he was so heartbroken, it was his favorite one. He said the little one was for his sister in heaven, so she could have a chick too. He left for school crying and the distraught mom had no-one to turn to for help.

And you tell me there is a god? Really?

/end of Making Up For Mother Nature post/

Thank you, Erma!

My second favorite household chore is ironing.
My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.
~Erma Bombeck

The sweetest beings

I spent the better part of this warm sunny day outside with my critters, both feathered and furried. So relaxing and rewarding, a real de-stresser. I'm a lucky mama!

Here are my 9-week old sweeties, who enjoyed their first free-range time outside today. They followed me everywhere and came to have a chat when I was sitting on the ground with my camera - what a treat!

Casper, such a gorgeous boy:

Little Miss Nugget:

Jericho the cream-sickle roo boy!

Sweet Robin, big fluffy girl!

When a chicken adopts you, it is a very special bond indeed.
Holding such a tiny heart in your hand, enveloped in soft feathers,
is beyond amazing.

Then you get your possy strutting around town,
Gossiping and hatching all kinds of naughty escape plans.
Or they might just be flirting and in love!

I'm posting happy moments because this morning was very difficult... My little baby chick that was very ill just wasn't getting any better despite lots of rest in the house, warmth and meds. I had a very hard choice to make: give it more time in the hopes it would get better and then risk it being a sickly chicken all its life, or end it pain and suffering and give it peace.

I chose compassion, lay my fear and sadness aside and did what one does when you love that much. Taking a life is not for the faint of heart and let me tell you, I have a very faint heart.

Heaven is richer today, one more sweet little angel in its choir.

My heart, however, is heavy and pretty damn angry at the unfairness of it all. All of this could have been prevented if only I'd been more vigilant, if only I had thought to check mama hen thoroughly before letting her hatch babies, if only I hadn't been so ignorant.

And now this is how I pay for knowledge.

I'm sorry if this post took a sad turn, but I have to stay true to myself and this is what I'm going through right now. Grief and loss and utter revulsion at having to kill a wee one.

Each life is unique and precious, each baby is a special gift.

Please hug your loved ones tonight, peeps - do it for me, do it for them.

But most of all, do it because of love.

/end of The Great Void post/

I love a lovely day :)

Blessed is a warm and sunny spring day, for they have been quite rare the past few weeks!

I won't bore you with what I did today but if you're curious here's a nutshell, borrowed from my Facebook status:

Technodoll did unspeakable things today, got covered in old cobwebs, dirt and chicken poop, got soaked by broken hoses and breathed in way too much sawdust. She thinks a glass of red wine and a hot bubble bath is in order. Amen.

I'm at the wine stage right now, eying that bubble bath with glee!

*pause to admire fresh baby buds in our garden*

Isn't nature just awesome?

Speaking of nature, I started another incubation yesterday so more babies due May 10th. Yeah, I know: I'm an addict! In all fairness, the babies are mostly sold already so it's not adding anyone to the flock. We're ok :)

I think the wine is going to my head a bit fast.

Wheeeeeeee!

Feels weird to not have Vegas around tonight. I hope he's enjoying the sounds of the city because the frogs are having a mega party tonight, building a choir to bury all choirs! Those amphibians can make a racket but oh, how I love their songs... To me it's synonymous with spring, with warmth and life and new beginnings.

Which reminds me: I need a haircut.

Random, much?

Oh dear!

G'nite peeps, don't get into any shenanigans and if you do, well at least enjoy them.

A robber burst into a bank brandishing a gun and yelled at the teller "Give me the money! One false move and you're geography!" The teller said "Don't you mean history?" The robber screamed "Don't change the subject!"

Pollutionation

Our environmental problems originate
in the hubris of imagining ourselves
as the central nervous system or the brain of nature.
We're not the brain, we are a cancer on nature.
~Dave Foreman, Harper's, April 1990

Here we go again!

Just when I think everything's under control, something happens. I'm struck by how naive I am and, oh I dunno, easily fooled into a false sense of security?

The batch of babies that hatched under mama hen have lice.

Yes, you heard me: lice.

I never in a million years imagined this could happen, or that the flock was infested AGAIN. Fuck! They've been treated so many fucking times now! I don't understand!

GAAAAAAAAAAH!

So now the babies have all been treated and one of them is really sick, it's in a box on our counter under a heating lamp - I had to syringe meds down its throat, poor little bugger. Crossing fingers it gets better... They are so tiny and so fragile at this age :-/

Half of them go to their new homes at the end of the week so thank goodness I caught this in time - my reputation could have been ruined!

Tomorrow I will have to clean out and disinfect the entire coop as well as treat 30 birds (catch, hold, put some drops on the skin of their neck - not an easy feat let me tell you). If I'm lucky it will take me about 3 hours from start to finish. And then repeat again at some point because apparently the coop is cursed!

I get extra dog chores for the next couple of days, too.

Ah well.

Owning pets is about assuming the bad with the good, right?

At least it's supposed to be warm and sunny tomorrow, for a change. Then this headache can take a hike, everyone can enjoy some fresh air and life is good :)

Good news: we paid a super accountant to get our taxes done and taadaaah! A nice refund is on the way, yey! I can pay off my laptop and re-invest the money into my RRSP's to ensure another refund next year. Or so I hope. And I'm getting my hair cut this week, too! Bonus!

On this note, I'm off to put freshly-washed sheets on the bed and try to get some sleep, if sleep will have me.

/end of Wishing For Mister Sandman post/

Laughing at women

Or, The Joke's On Them Because Women Are Laughing, Too!

Well, some of us are.

Honestly. I'd have made such a good 50's housewife, minus a few annoying glitches. Like stockings. I don't understand stockings. They itch, they're uncomfortable, they're fragile and a pain to wash, they don't really hide anything or keep you warm. Whoever invented stockings should be strangled with a girdle!

To wit: sheer nonsense, pardon the pun:

But I've never burnt beer and I'm smart enough to throw away the evidence
of a botched dinner, call for delivery pizza and all is good.
See? I ought to teach these ladies the art:

Mirror, mirror, on the wall,
Who's the smartest one of all?
Meeeeeee!
Plus I'm cute so I got it all covered.
Mouahahhaha!

Nothing wrong with doing the dishes after dinner.
After all, most men suck at it so why clean up after them?
Everyone knows dishwater destroys one's delicate hands so then
husband has to fork over money for a manicure.
And a pedicure, because that's how salons do it.

It's not sexist, it's how things were done and then women went and burned their bras and look at the mess we're in. If you don't have a job or a working title, you're not considered a valuable member of society. "Housewife" is uttered in the same hushed tones as "useless", "lazy" and "unliberated".

Er, pardon me but who here is tired of working 40 hours a week for a paltry salary, rushing home to take care of the kids, groceries, laundry, dinner and a semblance of a social life?

Yeah, that's it ladies: time for a revolution!

I'm un-burning that bra, putting on an apron, fixing my husband a hot dinner when he comes home from work and freaking loving it! :-D

/end of Life Is For Living Not Slaving post/

Speak to the fist

Respect your efforts, respect yourself.
Self-respect leads to self-discipline.
When you have both firmly under your belt,
that's real power.
~Clint Eastwood

Yey weekend goodies!

I'm ignoring this shitty weather (ie: freezing rain and snow) by focusing on good stuff - besides, it can't rain all the time* - right?

My friend's hatch went brilliantly: 23 beautiful healthy chicks out of 24 eggs, which is a phenomenal success rate! I'm keeping one, and he's picking up the rest tomorrow evening. We're both so thrilled :)

Today was for driving a few towns over to meet my mom & stepdad for lunch - lovely time, btw - and pick up a young easter-egger hen as well as seven blue laced red wyandotte chicks: yey! They're gorgeous and they're very rare around these parts so I hope they grow up to be good specimens.

I'm all chickened out now.

Yes, you heard me: I've reached my limit, LOL!

In other news, one of the idiot boys (Dakotah) took himself off on a rabbit-hunting expedition this afternoon, in the muddy rain, only the rabbits are someone's pets in a hutch the next street over - GAAH! We got a phone call to come get our dog, quick - and let me tell you he got a beating! MoFo! He's escaped over a dozen times now the past month with no repercussions and today was just the straw that broke the boombah's back.

*deep breath*

Time to pretend to make dinner. Vegas is downstairs training and he expects a hot meal right after, I've instructions to have food ready by 7pm. I wonder if he'll like Kraft Dinner with ketchup in a smiley face?

Oh shut up, you know I kid.

Somewhat.

Have a great weekend, peeps!

*Eric Draven, The Crow

On humility

If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence,
try ordering somebody else's dog around.
~Will Rogers

In case you wondered...

...yes, I'm alive.

Hanging in there by some phantom thread, refusing to be pancaked.

I'm trying to take it easy today, just basic flock care, baby chick monitoring, dishes, cooking, laundry and web surfing... when all I want to do is fall into bed and sleep for a week. The cold rainy weather's lulling me into a gentle coma but I must resist.

Accountant guy is coming by at 5pm to do our taxes.

Really hoping to see a refund, money's really scarce these days.

Should I bake a cake this afternoon?

They say "fake it 'til you make it" so if I pretend life is awesome and normal and happy, it might magically turn out OK?

Fine, that's PMShitty hormones speaking there, plus residual trauma of having to cut off a two day-old's head with kitchen shears last night as it peeped, trembling in my hands...

I don't think to ever live that down.

Shitty birth defects - so not fair.

There is no god.

On the other hand, there is Mother Nature who tempts us with her bejeweled springtime gifts, behold a newborn garden at dusk:

For those in the cold gray rain,
I hope these pics brought a little ray of sunshine into your lives.

Signing off for today, and for once I won't apologize for my mood... If you've been reading me long enough you know the balance will swing back in the right direction again, it's just a temporary glitch.

/end of Thank Goodness For Vegas post/

Words fail me

I'm heartbroken, traumatized, wracked with grief and sick to my stomach. I don't know if I'll be able to sleep without being plagued by nightmares.

I had to take my first life tonight.

I don't want to talk about it, except to say I don't think I can ever do it again. Almost vomited from stress and emotional upheaval. I'm still shaking and don't know how to get a grip.

RIP sweet baby chick...

Heaven just gained an angel.

Eye candy (but not for eating)

I snapped a few pics of the babies today while they were out getting some fresh air n'sunshine, hoboy do they ever love their recess!

First, the 3-week olds:

The one on the left was the first born, a day early (March 23rd).
She's 3/4 polish, hence the awesome tophat!
On the right is the famous Flipper-girl - woo!

The babies, checking things out -
I love seeing their feathers grow in!
Like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get :-)

Now, the 8-week olds:

Nugget, always gossiping... tsk!

Like ducks in a row!
Casper, Nugget, Robin and Jericho in the back.

I love this sweet boy!
Hims gonna be big!

So to sum it up... I lost three girls the past three weeks (illnesses and injury) and re-homed one of my silkie roos as he was driving us- and the neighbors - batshit with his incessant screeching, so life is somehow balancing itself out.

Settled heart.

Wow. I've been typing up this post for over an hour now.

Zero concentration.

Just want to go soak in a hot bubble bath and sleep for twelve hours straight... Yeah, like that's gonna happen! Sigh. I'm busier now then when I had a 45-hour a week job in the city.

How the heck did that happen?!

/end of ZZZZZZZZZZ post/

Alien noodle bits

That's what my arms feel like.

And my legs.

Floppity flop flop.

That's it, I'm (hopefully) done with carpentry for the flock for a while.

While I enjoy building stuff to give them the best life possible in our current circumstances, I've reached my limit. I'm beyond sore and have other things to do with my daytime hours, dear lovelies!

Eleven silkie babies are due tomorrow and they're all pre-sold :-o

Twenty four assorted purebreds are due Friday, it's a batch I am incubating for a friend so the babies will only be here for a few days.

But still. Utter cuteness. Of course, I'll be keeping two or three...

One of my young girls who just started laying decided to go broody (oh, brother) so I'll let her hatch some silkie eggs since I have clients lined up for chicks... I'm not making any money out of this but it does help to pay for their food and I'm meeting such nice people along the way, plus I get to hold sweet babies so it's win-win all around :)

Last bit of chicken news for now:

My first batch of chicks are three weeks old tomorrow, how time flies!

I built them an exercise pen this afternoon as they were clamoring for fresh air and since I'm a sucker good mom, they got to enjoy their very first taste of grass and warm sunshine - they're like big feathery fleas, testing out their little wings with giant jumps, squeaking and cheeping and all scared of the big new world around them.

Video and/or pics to come tomorrow since we're doing it again :-D

Wow.

I'm so bleddy tired.

I guess today's post was only about chickens after all... OooOooops. Have I just become THAT sort of person? A kooky old boring housewife with overgrown roots, dirt under her fingernails, saggy pants and frizzy hair?

Um.

Time for a hot shower and an early night.

So bleddy tired.

So.

/end of Bring Out The Mulch Mama I'm Coming Home post/

Yeah baby, yeah!

Curve: The loveliest distance between two points.
~Mae West

Announcement

I'm rubbish at blogging these days.

(Yes, that's the announcement - no, I'm not preggers! LOL)

I've been lurking on your blogs but not leaving comments as most of the time it's fly-by, cup of coffee in hand so no typing fingers available - and as for posts here, meh... I just don't have it in me lately.

Inspiration's on the back-burner, folks.

I won't bore you with details, suffice to say lack of sleep coupled with morbid weather, deaths, illnesses and personal obstacles have sapped my happy mojo so rather than go on and on about it here, I'm taking it easy.

Maybe posting a few pics will help bring the Happy back?

A random selection...

My dad in his Sunday morning gear, brushing their dog Sunny...

Can't wait to see our gardens this color again - Spring! Come back!

Sweet Miss Coco Chanel...

Marla and Tyler Durden in the blustery winds - random enough for ya?

All right then, I'm about to crash head-first into bed any minute now... What a day. Tired, beyond tired. But it's all good, no complaints here.

Hope you all had a fantastic weekend! Do tell me about it ;-)

/end of Technozero post/

RIP sweet angel

There are things that we don't want to happen but have to accept,
things we don't want to know but have to learn,
and people we can't live without but have to let go.
~Author Unknown

We love you, sweet Kiwi...
We will cherish your memory forever -
Sweet sunshine in our hearts.

I am so sorry I couldn't save you :(

Oooo la la (dee da)

Where to begin?

We have a house showing tomorrow.
Which meant frantic cleaning and landscaping today.
Which will be demolished by tonight's snow.
You heard me: SNOW.
More frantic cleaning tomorrow morning.
Then we have to be out of the house, with the 3 dogs, while the realtor shows the place.
What the hell are we going to do for 1.5 hours with dogs in the freezing rain.
This spring is psychotic.
Bi-polar.
Arctic and Antarctic.
Ha ha.

My favorite comedians are back!
So excited - take a look, you Kids In The Hall fans!

LOVE these guys!

I ache in places I didn't know I had.
Stupid muscles.
Going to soak in a hot bubble bath now.
Well, after this glass of wine.
Thank you Vegas for bringing your wife a bottle after work :-D

Tomorrow we're meeting friends in the city for a sushi dinner - can't wait!
A nice reward for being a good house-wifey.
If only we'd get an offer for this place, that would be nice.
Maybe the lovely red cedar mulch I put in the flower beds today will seal the deal!
Stupid snow.
It better not cover the daffodils.
Grrrrr.

Kiwi is leaving us this weekend.
Tomorrow or Sunday, not sure yet.
I want it over with so I can grieve properly and not hang with pain like this.
Stupid senseless injury.
I love her so much :(

I ate an entire family-sized bag of M&M easter eggies by myself in two sittings.
Trying to feel ashamed but considering opening the 2nd bag instead.
This is love.

/end of Fruitless Means Without Fruit post/

Supershite

In certain trying circumstances,
urgent circumstances,
desperate circumstances,
profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer.
~Mark Twain

The winds of change

Well, we splinted Kiwi's leg yesterday and after seeing her struggle with the contraption, it's pretty evident it won't work... She's not using her foot and she keeps throwing her leg out to the side, like before - this tells me it's NOT her knee after all - it's her whole leg :-(

No doubt there is nerve damage in there somewhere, which is not curable. Plus she just went broody so she's focused on spending her time huddled in a corner, sitting on imaginary eggs and not building strength in her leg.

My heart's just broken... So. Not. Fair.

I have to be strong and do the right thing, so this weekend I'll bring her to my friend's place and we will have her cross the bridge there. My poor baby :(

For those who asked, here's a photo of Flipper from last weekend - as you can see, it's not the same splinting a baby's soft leg that needs straightening VS a damaged adult's leg...

At least we saved one of them:

Terrible photo, but you can see she's standing on her own!

We're getting a wave of British weather (cold, rainy, grey...), yecchh. Need to put the gardening on hold and focus on cleaning up the basement with a bit of paint, as per the realtor's suggestion.

I also have another chicken condo to build as the babies are growing and need more space - *flexes man arms* - so I need to get some more lumber this afternoon... All right then, gotta run now - the car is due at the garage for summer tires and an oil change... yey!

Here's to hoping it will NOT snow anymore! Please!

/end of Wah Wah post/

Hope springs eternal

As I was about to give Kiwi a sedative this morning to make her passing less stressful, a ray of sunlight poured into the coop, slicing through thick grey morning fog.

I massaged her leg one last time and found it strange that she reacted to a certain pressure on her knee - tested it a few times and OMG, I think I could possibly fix this... if she has a slipped tendon or a pinched nerve or a torn ligament, having her leg in a brace could give it time to heal...

We fixed Flipper, we can maybe fix Kiwi??

What the hell. I'm giving her 10 more days, we'll splint her leg and see what happens. She's young, she's strong, she's healthy and has a fighting spirit. I cannot give up on her without having tried absolutely everything in my power.

The x-rays showed no pelvic fracture, no hip dislocation - the vet didn't seem to know anything about chickens even if a bird is a bird (is a bird) so what do I have to lose? Everything to gain... Kiwi's life.

Even if she stays gimpy, if the treatment works and she can get around enough to enjoy a long and healthy, happy life - it's good enough.

Now's the time to send your good karma and healing vibes... prayers... anything you've got.

Look at this sweet, beautiful girl...

Come on people -let's HEAL that leg!
And nevermind stupid vets, what do they know!

Back soon!

OMG time has just flown out of my hands - I promise to check up on your blogs (and comment!) very soon, and also blog some real stuff here...

I haven't had much online time lately and what with the laptop transfer it's been difficult to get back into the normal speed of things. It's supposed to be quite shitty outside for the next week (lots of cold rain) so hopefully that'll encourage me to spend a bit o'time online, eh?

Tomorrow morning at 9am, my sweet Kiwi will cross the bridge. I said my goodbyes to her tonight and will never, ever get used to losing a sweet, loving hen like that. My heart's broken... I've shed many, many tears for this beautiful girl and can only hope she knows how much I love her, and that I'm doing this because I cannot stand to see her suffer anymore.

She gave us one last, perfect egg tonight and it sent me into a sobbing mess... I don't even have any babies from her, goddamn it :-(

Please send me courage to get through this... it's not getting any easier.

Death will be the death of me.

/end of Messy post/

So what's new, pussycat?

I'm not really in the mood for blogging today so it'll be short n'snappy:

New laptop? LOVE IT!! I'm still not done moving my stuff on it and installing apps but it's going well. Yey!

We had a nice family dinner Friday night, our visitors didn't stay very long (gone early Saturday morning) but it was super lovely, I'm grateful they made the long trip to come see us - we ate like kings thanks to my stepmom's super cesar salad and my dad's spaghetti and Lindt bunnies - yum!

The flock loooves the new run extension even if they've already eaten everything in it... Sigh. Food machines. Vegas and I spent a big chunk of Saturday building a big chicken tractor (portable pen) and were very proud of our efforts until we slapped the front bit on... redneck special... and then the kicker was when we realized the damn thing was two inches wider than the garage door so we couldn't get it out.

Yep, we were THOSE people for a moment.

*hides under workbench*

We did have a giggle though, I mean come ON it was so dumb - next time we'll remember to either build stuff outside or measure the door we have to go through and not build anything bigger than that!

Lordy.

Point form stuff:

• Wet chickens stink, no matter how much shampoo is involved.
• Raking = sore backs, very very sore backs.
• Mother Nature is toying with us these days.
• Boiling hot one day, freezing the next.
• Our first daffodils bloomed!
• Smoked meat sammich & fries = awesome Easter lunch.
• Bloating from too much salt, not so much fun.

We met with an awesome realtor this weekend and signed a 6-month contract, that'll hopefully help get this property off our hands by summertime. At least we really hope so. It would be nice to finally be in a place we can settle into and call our own for a while, you know?

Lots of new chicks on the way, most of them pre-sold. I never thought so many people would want babies and fertilized eggs, I actually have a waiting list! :-o

I'm off to get some groceries now... This gloomy windy afternoon is for movies and popcorn, and uploading pics for the next post.

Virtual chocolate bunnies for everyone!

/end of Easter Schmeaster Weekend post/

On this note...

I must be the cutest wife evar!
Happy Easter!

When enough is enough!

Oh happy joyjoy, I went and done it (thanks to Vegas, of course... such an awesome enabler, LOL!) - I got a new laptop today!

I effing HATE the one I have, since Day 1 it has given me nothing but trouble and lately it's been acting up so much, I'm afraid of the blue screen of death - part of the problem is no doubt due to Windows Vista piece of shit, but this laptop is linked to the termination at my old job - very bad time, let's not get into that - anyways goodbye Dell, welcome Acer!

I'll have to get a decal for the cover to make is sexay (my Dell is a sweet pink and I kinda got spoiled with that...), Monday is transition day since it's supposed to rain. Gotta transfer everything to the new machine, install all my apps and programs, wipe this drive and reformat because I want to sell it to help fund my new toy.

Going dirt cheap, any takers? :-)

It's a pink Dell Studio 15 and it does have its merits if you can endure the quirks. Got it November 2008 so it's got a few years left on it. The bitchy thing is it cost a bundle, almost double what my new one just cost :-o

Ah well. This is what happens when you send your husband to Costco to get dog food. He comes back with a laptop because he can't stand your sailor cursing any longer :-D

I'll need a few weeks to pay him back but he knows I'm good for it.

No jokes about $20 handjobs, please.

*grin*

It's been a spectacularly warm and sunny day - I've enjoyed spending time in the sun with the flock, big and small. I worked my arse off completing the extension to the chicken run and whew! Done! The girls LOVE it! I've ticked everything off today's list, belly is warm with lovely dinner and I'm off for a hot shower now.

I love my life :-)

Happy Friday, peeps!

America is a melting pot. The people at the bottom get burnt, and the scum rises to the top.