Thursday, October 7, 2010

I'm losing the notion of time

I thought today was Friday.

Seriously.

The days all blend in together, it's kinda funny actually. I don't wear a watch so don't keep track of time and I often can't figure out what date we are.

I could feel lost but instead I just feel... free :-)

About ten days ago I decided to try something new to combat the rising anxiety and panic attacks that had dug their claws into me, clinging like toilet paper to the bottom of my shoe 18 hours a day. I woke up anxious in the morning and went to bed anxious at night, not really knowing what the heck was wrong until it hit me while writing down item 173 on The To Do List.

That damned list.

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh!

My life was being governed by unending tasks, chores, errands and "stuff", each hour of the day crammed with something pressing to do. What a horrible way to live - slave to pen and paper? No. Thanks.

I decided to test my theory and just... stopped writing stuff down.

The important appointments and "must not forget" things and dates still went in the To Do List (which is actually a day-by-day agenda book) but the rest were to be ad lib, as they happened and needed to be done. I always keep a loose list in my head to cover the basics but that's that.

And you know what?

It worked :-)

My heart rate is down, anxiety levels are down, panic attacks are less frequent, I'm sleeping better and have tons more energy. Who knew something so trivial could bring a person down like that? :-o

Anyone else out there have/had a similar experience?

/end of Hallelujah! post/

8 comments:

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Good for you, so glad you found the balance.

Busy Bee Suz said...

Yep. Just get to the most important stuff, and everything else will get done in time.
You need to breathe girlfriend...you are living the life and it must be enjoyed!!!

Vegas said...

I can confirm that TD is indeed more relaxed and chilled - hooray for self-analysis :)

x

Keri said...

I've had those moments. Especially when I was planning my wedding. It was horrible. I had so much to do and I am such a procrastinator. Luckily it eased off after it was all planned and over.
Just breathe!! :)

blueviolet said...

I get even more stressed if I don't write it down!

prin said...

YEY!!!! I don't know where I was when you wrote this post, but I musta twitched or somethin' inexplicably...

To do lists are the emeny. :D

YEY! I'm kinda proud of you, which hopefully doesn't sound patronizing...

JeanMarie said...

There is much to be said for intuitive self knowledge. Glad it's working for you : )

Lady Banana said...

I wish I could feel free like that but if I don't have a list I get anxious I will forget something important!