Monday, July 23, 2007

"Playbitch" centerfold, August issue

Reeeerr! Come to papa! LOL

On a more serious note, it's hot. It's bleddy hot. Both dogs are panting terribly after a short run in the sunny bee-filled field. At least I got to make a few phonecalls while they were out doing their thing (mom, Smiler, my bro) so I'm not completely out of touch with the world...

I don't feel alone, I am not alone. Just lonely for the dream I've been living the past years that is now shattered, being held together by spit and leftover hope. Trying to keep my dignity intact while everything else melts away. My stomach is in knots a good portion of the day, my headaches have returned and I hear ghosts at every turn of my head. Sometimes I wonder if just never loving again, just being numb would be easier. Why sink all this effort into something that will ultimately leave you with nothing but scars?

Some days are better than others, I guess this isn't one of them to be honest. Thanks to everyone who reached out to me today, who sent a word of encouragement and a virtual hug - yes I'll get through this and your help makes it real. Love, peace, out.

1 comment:

jeanmare said...

{{TD}} The problem is that when we fall in love, we don't know the ending that awaits us, do we? And as with so many other situations, yes, there are scars, but there are also memories of joy and shared experiences that you wouldn't want to have missed.

Sometimes life sucks. Sometimes it's miraculous and amazing. Here's praying that the suckyness fades & the miraculousness flows your way soon.

You are loved!